Walking through the fog

Last week, we strolled the foggy streets of Blowing Rock, NC.  It felt a bit surreal, only being able to see a short distance in any direction because of thick clouds hovering like smoke.

Upon returning from our trip, we were asked, "Isn't that area in the Blue Mountains just lovely?"  Well, I imagine it is lovely indeed, but the enveloping fog prevented us from seeing any evidence of the mountains sitting just beyond the limits of our vision.

As many of you know, we are moving to Vietnam in January.  And it's sometimes very difficult for me to wrap my mind around the reality that we're really moving to another new place next month.  NEXT MONTH!  As I go about each day in this little bubble of a known schedule for the next few weeks, I can't even picture beyond our departure.  My vision of what is to come just stops in late January.  Everything beyond then is a vast, dense fog.

Some days (mostly mornings... when I am full of energy) this circumstance is exciting.  I imagine the adventures, the new foods, new people to befriend, new home to set up, new language to learn, new work to explore... and I am filled with joy and readiness to embrace all the unknowns lying ahead.  Other days (mostly evenings... when I'm most tired) the exact same elements -- the new challenges, foods, people, home to set up (again), tonal language to learn, and new job -- overwhelm me and leave me feeling completely inadequate and daunted at the thought of all the uncertainty ahead.

Thankfully, I've become aware of these recurring mental and emotional swings.  (And I've decided to prohibit myself from doing too much processing of things in the evenings.)

The reality is, I know this next phase of our journey will include elements of both extremes.  I know there will be days when aspects of life in Vietnam will feel like insurmountable challenges, and other days the same things will be energizing adventures.  I will enjoy many of the new foods, and there'll probably be a few I'll hope to never eat again.  Settling into a new house will be a fun opportunity, and slowly that house will become home.  It will also probably be a source of frustration at times if things don't function the ways I want them to.  Some days, I'll feel like I'm failing miserably at learning the language, and other days I'll feel I've made immense progress.  Our work will likely be draining at times, and at other times it will be downright energizing and encouraging.

It's important to keep reminding myself that neither my glossy morning picture nor my dismal evening picture is fully accurate.  I need not fool myself with the one, nor fear the other.  Instead, I hope to be able to walk into the fog with openness and patience to embrace the mix of ups and downs that surely lie ahead.